Lakeside Sweethearts Page 16

  Agnes put a hand on her arm. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes, as long as I slow down.”

  “Does your doctor realize who he has for a patient?”

  Josie nodded toward the counter. “Yeah, well, Watchdog Nick promised to look after me.”

  Nick returned at that moment, carrying two mugs. He set one in front of his wife; then he settled on one of the side chairs. The scent of vanilla drifted over them. “Your health and our unborn babies are my priorities.”

  Josie took a sip of tea, then set it on the coffee table. She glanced at Nick. “Nick and I talked. Then on the way home, I called Dad and Grace. Now that they’re both retired, they’re willing to take over Cuppa Josie’s for an undetermined amount of time.”

  Agnes regretted turning down the offer of tea. She needed something to do with her hands. She picked up one of the throw pillows and hugged it to her chest. “What do you mean by taking over?”

  Josie shifted so she faced her friend. “I mean they will be running the business instead of me. Grace will do the baking, and Dad’s going to take over the business end of things.”

  “So you won’t be here at all?”

  “No.”

  The single word felt like a punch in the stomach.

  Josie pressed a hand on Agnes’s knee. “But don’t worry, Agnes—your job is totally safe.”

  That was the last thing she was worried about at the moment. “Thanks for that, but it won’t be quite the same without you.”

  “I’m sorry.” Josie reached for her tea again, but not before Agnes caught a flicker of sadness.

  “No, don’t apologize. I didn’t mean to heap a big ole scoop of guilt on your head. Just making a comment. So, when will they take over?” Agnes rushed to put her friend at ease, feeling awful for her selfish thinking. Of course Josie needed to take care of herself.

  “You like Dad and Grace, right?” The look in Josie’s eyes pleaded for her to understand and accept the new changes.

  Agnes forced a smile on her face and laughed. “Oh, absolutely, Sugar Pie.”

  Josie released a sigh and rested her head against the back of the couch. “Good, because they adore you. My dad thinks you’re feisty. They will be here on Monday. I’m going to spend a couple of hours with them each day to help them get a feel for everything, but then Nick is insisting I go home and limit my activities.”

  Agnes stared out the window at the rain pelting the flowers ringing the ornamental trees planted near the curb. Even though rain coursed down the petals, the stems kept them strong…kept them from lying in the muddy mulch…exhausted from defeat.

  Josie and Nick needed her. They counted on her. And she needed to buck up and be the friend they deserved.

  “Now, don’t you worry another minute. Between your daddy and Grace, we’ll keep this place going with no problem.”

  Tears filled Josie’s eyes. “You are the most amazing friend. You know that?”

  “You stop that crying, or ole Nick’ll have two blubbering females on his hands. And what guy wants that?” Agnes succeeded in making Josie laugh and drying her eyes.

  Agnes gathered Josie’s and Nick’s empty mugs and carried them to the kitchen sink, needing a few minutes to process without an audience. As she wet a sponge and added a drop of dish soap, she let the tears flow down her face.

  So many changes in everyone else’s lives, but hers felt empty. Did God decide after thirty-six years of trying, she simply wasn’t worth the effort anymore?

  She wanted to call Ian and share this new information about Josie and Nick, but he wouldn’t want to be bothered. She could call Mama, but after talking to her the other day, she knew Mama was busy moving Memaw into her new apartment.

  She’d power through this by herself. After all, relying on others created unnecessary heartache. And she couldn’t handle one more thing today.

  The kitchen door opened. “You about ready, Agnes?”

  Agnes nodded and tried to keep her voice light. “Yes, give me another minute.”

  “You okay? Your voice sounds funny.”

  Agnes didn’t even bother to cover her face. She gripped the edge of the sink and dropped her head as sobs shook her shoulders. “He doesn’t want me, Josie. Said I wasn’t worth it.”

  “Oh, Agnes. I’m so sorry.” Josie wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “What happened?”

  Agnes dried her eyes with the back of her hand and reached for a paper towel. She relayed the events of the past few weeks, ending with Ian walking out. “If there’s damage to the door, I’ll pay for it.”

  “Seriously, Agnes? I don’t care about that. I care about you. Ian loves you. He’s mad. Let him blow off steam, and he’ll come around. Remember what I went through with Nick? Why don’t you come home with us for the afternoon? You can hear about Hannah’s latest friend drama and snuggle up with Noah. We can find a chick flick and make homemade pizza.”

  “Thanks, Sugar Pie. I think I’ll take you up on that.”

  “Great, I’ll have Nick turn out the lights in the dining room while you grab your stuff.”

  The coffee shop phone rang, but Josie must have grabbed it in the dining room since the ringing stopped before Agnes could reach it.

  Josie pushed through the kitchen door, her face drained of color.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She held out the phone. “Pete’s on the line for you.”

  Agnes took the phone. “Hello?”

  “Agnes Joy, it’s Pete.”

  “What’s up?”

  “We’re at the emergency room. Ian fell off a ladder. He’s unconscious, but no broken bones.” Pete’s voice choked.

  To hear Pete lose it sent a tremor through her body. Her heart tumbled down her chest, knocking off each rib before smashing at her feet. She shot a glance at Josie.

  Josie reached for her hands. “We will take you to the hospital.”

  “I’m on my way, Pete.”

  Ian had to be okay. He had to. She couldn’t imagine life without him.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Josie was right—she needed to decide if she was willing to risk her heart with Ian.

  Seeing him in that exam room, his skin as pasty as the sheets, nearly did her in.

  Thankfully he’d suffered only a concussion. Once she knew he was out of danger, she slipped away.

  Time to put the past where it belonged so she could focus on her future. Even if it didn’t include Ian.

  And that’s the only reason she agreed to talk to Bobby.

  She was tired of fighting it. Tired of lying to herself. When she called, she asked if he could extend his stay until that evening. Apparently what he wanted to say was important enough for him to agree to do it.

  Now Agnes stood on Mama’s deck and tried to avoid looking in the direction of the James property line.

  When Agnes told Nick and Josie about Bobby wanting to talk, they insisted on being close by, so they hung out in Mama’s living room while she headed for the backyard.

  She breathed a prayer of protection, although she wasn’t quite sure who needed it most—she or Bobby.

  Bobby wouldn’t hurt her.

  Not here. Not now.

  She didn’t have proof to back up her instincts, but something about him seemed different…calmer…more mature.

  Might as well get this over with.

  Carrying two glasses of sweet tea, Agnes crossed the yard to the koi pond where Bobby sat in one of the white Adirondack chairs. The last thing she wanted was to be hospitable, but Mama’s voice inside her head reminded her of those Southern-bred manners.

  The wet grass from yesterday’s downpour coated her bare feet. Sunlight elbowed its way through the storm clouds to cast a glow across the yard.

  Her heart quaked with each step.

  She handed Bobby a cold glass, then sat opposite him, keeping her eyes fixed on the fat fish in the pond.

  Resting her elbows on the chair arms, she held the glass with two hands. “So, what d
id you want to talk about, Bobby?”

  He downed half his glass, then set it on the grass next to his chair. He cleared his throat. “First off, I have a confession—I didn’t return to Shelby Lake to win you back.”

  Of course not. He didn’t want her the first time around, so why would he bother again? Not that she wanted him back, but his blatant rejection still stung a little.

  “Then why did you say it?” She didn’t mean to snap, but his presence had her on edge.

  “I couldn’t miss a chance to ruffle Ian’s feathers.”

  She wanted to smack that grin off his face. “Grow up, Bobby. That stupid rivalry is in the past.”

  Maybe this was a mistake.

  He cleared the smile from his face and schooled his expression into a more serious one. “I have grown up, Agnes. A lot in the past five years.”

  “Too bad you couldn’t have done it while we were still married.”

  “I know. And I’m sorry.” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and rubbed his palms together. “For everything. You put your heart into our marriage. I didn’t even meet you halfway. I can’t take back what happened.”

  As she sat across from him, digesting his words, appreciating the truth he seemed to realize too late.

  She took in his buzzed hair and trimmed beard. Apparently he took greater pride in his appearance now than when they were married. Then she caught a glint on his left hand. Something she didn’t notice before.

  “You’re married.”

  Bobby glanced at the plain gold band on his left hand as a slow smile stretched across his face—one of those kinds of smiles that simply couldn’t be constrained.

  Agnes lowered her glass to the ground for fear of dropping it and spilling tea all over her lap. “You’re in love with her.”

  “Of course I am. Her name’s Wendy. We met about three and a half years ago.”

  “Where?”

  “Would you believe her dad’s church? We were in a singles Bible study together. One night I asked her out for coffee. Things progressed from there. We’ve been married for two years.”

  “You went to church?”

  “Go figure, huh? After what happened…with you, I guess you could say I hit bottom. I went on a three-day bender, passed out in a park and ended up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning. Once I was released, I checked into rehab to dry out. Longest thirty days of my life.” He reached into his front pocket and flipped a coin to her.

  She caught it and recognized it as a sobriety chip. Daddy used to carry one in his pocket, too. “How long have you been sober?”

  “Four years.”

  “Congratulations.”

  “Thanks. Wendy’s dad, Tim, is a pastor, who visited me in rehab and led me to the Lord. Can you believe it?” Tears glossed his green eyes. He sniffed and ran a hand under his nose. “A drunk like me who used to hurt the one woman he promised to cherish? What could God want with me? I fought it for a while, but Tim’s words soaked in.”

  Tears welled in her eyes…she couldn’t help it. His vulnerability nicked at the wall she’d built to protect herself from being hurt again. The man who sat beside her might have resembled the same one whose angry shouts bounced off the walls and struck out at her, whittling away at her self-esteem. But he wasn’t the same person she married.

  No, with his clear eyes and clean-cut appearance, he wore redemption with grateful ease.

  She pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face, allowing the resentment gurgling deep inside to well up and overflow. She wanted to lash out at him. Ask what was so wrong with her that he couldn’t change while being married to her.

  Her heart hung like a rusty gate.

  How many times had she asked him to come to worship with her? How many times had she sat in that pew alone and tried not to envy the many couples that populated the congregation? How many times had she prayed to God to change his heart?

  Why hadn’t God listened?

  But it seems He had. Just not in time to save her marriage.

  Apparently she wasn’t worth either of their efforts.

  “It wasn’t you.”

  She popped her head up to find him kneeling in front of her chair. He reached for her hand, and she tensed.

  He must’ve felt her anxiety because he released her hand but stayed in front of her. “Agnes, you are an amazing woman. I was the screwup in our marriage.”

  Her chest shuddered. She stared over his head at the slice of water against the horizon, trying to keep her eyes from filling.

  She had wasted emotional energy on him for years. Ian was right—he wasn’t worth a minute more. But try as she might, she couldn’t harness the pain that threaded her words. “Why couldn’t you change for me? Why couldn’t you love me?”

  Bobby dragged his hands through his hair. “I don’t know. I spent so much time trying to figure it out. When I think of the way I treated you, it makes me sick. I don’t deserve it, but I hope you can forgive me someday.”

  Forgive?

  Him?

  The few bruises he had caused had faded years ago, but what about the ones deeply imprinted on her soul? The ones that reminded her she was nothing more than a throwaway?

  The hollow spot in her womb was a constant reminder of his destruction of their marriage. And he wanted her to forgive him? For depriving her of a future? How could she do that?

  “Is that why you’re here? To get my forgiveness so you can go on your merry way and have a happy life?” Bitterness tainted her words.

  He stared at her a moment, then shook his head. “No. I’m ashamed to say, but it’s taken me this long to find the courage to face you. Making amends is part of the recovery process, but I kept putting it off. Like I said, my past actions make me sick. I wasn’t the kind of husband you deserved.”

  “What does your wife say about all of this?”

  “She knows every sordid detail. I don’t keep secrets from her. She encouraged me to come and see you. We needed to close this door, so she and I can raise our family with no regret.”

  “Family? You have children?” Her voice caught.

  “Not quite. Wendy is four months pregnant. She’s due before Christmas.”

  The irony slashed her core.

  The cracks and crevices that had been patched around her heart split open. An ache carved out a crater in her chest so quickly she gasped for breath.

  A sob clogged her throat, but she kept swallowing until she could speak without losing her composure.

  With stiffened limbs, she forced herself to her feet. “Thank you for coming, Bobby. I appreciate the apology. I wish you well with your new life.”

  Bobby pulled out his wallet, removing a folded piece of paper. He held it out to her. “This is to repay you for the gambling debts and credit cards I racked up and left you with.”

  Agnes took it, unfolded the check and read the amount. The paper nearly fluttered through her fingers as she sucked in a breath. With wide eyes, she looked at him. “Where did you get this money?”

  “I worked for it. Construction work pays well, especially when you’re working sixty to eighty hours a week.”

  After Bobby left, she had worked with a debt consolidation program to pay off his online gambling debts and credit cards. She’d lived on a shoestring budget, making do or going without, pulling extra shifts at Cuppa Josie’s and selling her restored furniture. And she resented him for what he did.

  But she managed to pay everything off herself, despite Mama’s repeated offers of help. The day she wrote the last check to clear his financial destruction was the same day she filed paperwork to revert to her maiden name. She didn’t want to be Agnes Levine any longer. She needed to find freedom to live again.

  Now he just gave her an extravagant ticket to freedom. She had more than enough for car repairs and to increase her down payment on Clarence and Eliza’s cottage.

  “Thank you, Bobby.” She still couldn’t believe it.

  “No need to th
ank me.”

  “You could have mailed the check with a note.”

  “No, I needed to man up and take responsibility for what I did. I needed to apologize face-to-face.”

  This was not the man she had married.

  Tears warmed her eyes, but this time she wasn’t angry or resentful. This time she felt something unexpected. Something almost foreign.

  She was…proud of Bobby. For growing up and owning up to his mistakes…something she wanted so long ago.

  Apparently God answered her prayers in His timing, rather than hers.

  Bobby glanced at his watch. “I guess I should hit the road. Wendy’s waiting for me.”

  “I always wondered what I’d do if I saw you again—the words I’d say. When you asked if you could meet, I realized now was my chance to say all of those things that have been building through the years. You hurt me badly, Bobby. There were days I didn’t think I would recover, but I did. These past five years have made me stronger and more reliant on God. For those, I am thankful.” She swallowed and blinked back wetness. “Thank you for owning up to the past. I appreciate it more than you know. It gave me courage to take some steps forward. I forgive you, Bobby, and I wish you and Wendy all the happiness with your baby.”

  Bobby looked at her with overly bright eyes. “Thanks, Agnes. It means a lot.”

  “If you hurt your wife or that child in any way, I’ll hunt you down. That’s not a threat, but a promise. Be the man you claim to be.”

  “Agnes, the one thing I always counted on were your promises. The man you knew no longer exists. With God’s help, I will honor my family the way they deserve. I’m just sorry I couldn’t be the man you deserved.”

  “Like you said—that’s the past. Move forward.”

  “You, too, Agnes. I hope this can bring you closure to face your future with someone who will love you the way you deserve.”

  Bobby was right—his apology did give her closure, but the one person who held her heart didn’t want it anymore. That was the closure she truly needed to live again.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The house was almost unrecognizable from the afternoon in May when she’d come to see it with Ian.